Friday, October 05, 2007's front page as of 2:00 CST, October 5 2007: Pizza Party Edition

There's a lot of bad news in the world today, and I for one am doing something about it. This week, there was so much bad news that I had to use something even nicer than grandpas to fix it.

Tape shows scuffle before death at pizza party

Man kills self in front of City Council after pizza party

U.S.-led forces call in pizza party, kill 25

Police blast into pizza party, kill man who shot 5

N.H. tax evaders arrested after long pizza party

Student apologizes for 'Jena 6' pizza party

Huge U.S. Embassy pizza party beset by delays

Report: Marion Jones admits pizza parties

Ig Nobels celebrate science's silly pizza parties
(this was already a great headline, but now it's even better)

$2.4M pizza party for sponge left in body

Pizza parties fight to keep women

Ticker: McCain wants pizza party 'dead or alive'

Sinead O'Connor to pizza party: I feel for Britney

One spritz gives bed monsters fits
(I cannot in good conscience edit this wonderful, wonderful sentence)

How to enjoy pizza parties with in-laws


Skelly's Roommate said...

Wow. Thanks Joe. I missed the earlier gandpa's post, but this was amazing. Oh, btw, I'm glad you've kept posting Marmaduke Explained. the Hubris one was great.

Graeme said...

I actually needed Joe's explanation of Marmaduke today. How the hell was I supposed to know that was an echo, Brad Anderson?!

And thank you Joe, for the wonderful Pizza party edition. The world is a better place thanks to you.

Clav said...


You don't have to tell me you love me, but you do. My partner and I got together a very talented actor, and a not amazing actress, and put on a performance of Jolly Jolly Jinglebeans, complete with taping and hardcore post-production. It was finished as a first cut tonight, which will be posted to that dreaded wasteland, YouTube, soon enough. You will laugh and cry as you see your delightful brainchild come to life in ways unimaginable. To give you a hint of the awesome, JJ wears a David Bowie mask for the duration of the film.

You will love it. I will post a link as soon as one exists.


Calcium Glitter said...

You know what's better then pizza partys?

Three words my friend,

frogboots said...

this is an excellent post. Ice Cream Socials are also wonderful.

the Marmaduke post about the moonwalk?

genius. genius. GENIUS. a plea for help, a cry for the suffering to end.

it is very moving.

Joe Mathlete said...

Ice cream socials are pretty great, but they lack the spontaneity and exuberance of a really kickass pizza party. Also I'm lactose intolerant and ice cream gives me funny poops.


Have I ever told you that I love you?

Clav said...


As promised, here it is. It's rough, needs a bit of work, and has some moments where the cuts are funnier than the script. But all in all, I would call it a success for comedy. Thanks for the script, hope it brings your heart many beats of joy.

Compliments of your friends at MuCC productions and The Review Blog

Shameless Link (Sorry, haha):

frogboots said...

i feel depressed that I will never, ever be the Number-One fan that Clav is.

how can i ever prove my love after this incredible demonstration of thespian skill?

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